Somebody must've known how my heart would feel when they wrote this song.

by Deerheart

I saw you
You saw me
That's when I needed you
You needed me
I kissed you
You kissed me
And thought forever yeah
We'll always be
Well I like you
 You like me
Seems that we fit so perfectly
You make me feel worthy
And I've let you take care of me

We're alright now
Gonna breakdown the breakdown
Move from where we stand
See what we don't want to see

I love you
You love me
Oh but lately
Something's wearing on me
I've been growing
I've been changing
And seems like you're barely moving

There is nothing we can do to get past this
Nothing you could say
Baby please don't fret
Our time has moved passed us
I love you
You love me
Is it possible we love differently
You need me but I need to
Feel strong baby without you


I want to go on a vacation, maybe for a month...

....but of course I can't 'coz I'm still new to my work even if I've been here for 2 months and 2 weeks already. I just feel that I need some rest or some more time with the people I love. I spend so little time at home that I could actually feel that when I see my mom or dad, it's like I haven't seen them for a week. I also don't get to see my brother anymore because when I go home from work, he's already asleep because he's on graveyard shift.

I see my friends only during weekends or only when they have the time and money to see me before I go to work. And also, I only get to see Macky during weekends because he works during regular office hours while I work from 2 to 10 p.m., so that makes it harder for me to divide my time during weekends. How I wish I could ask God to add another day in my week, maybe call it Appleday or whatever. God, I just need more time to rest, laugh, ponder and sleep, but my want and need to have a rest day doesn't mean that I hate my work.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE my job, and every day I feel that I have greater responsibilities. Well, literally I have some added up work. A day after I got my ID, I was informed by my workmate that I will not just handle the Twitter segment but I will start handling the YouScoop segment this week. I am not pressured or stressed at all but rather, I feel glad because I feel trusted even though I'm still new. I just hope that everyday, I could live up to their expectations and maybe, just maybe, get a chance to work for other GMA shows.

Well I guess for now, I will just make myself happy with the thought that I'm getting my salary on Friday and have an all-girl Football and chikka sleepover with the best girl friends in the world. :)

Hey Mr. Noli

We've been together for twenty years; we've been father and baby, playmates, friends, confidante, jealous father and daughter, then enemies, but I love you just the same. Thank you papa for giving me your awesome looks *puke*, for the hugs and kisses, the Jackie Chan movie marathons, the silly games, the piggybacks, the spontaneous dates,the jokes, the company,the songs and dances, the roses, the advices,  the best and bad times we had together that made me this strong,wise and brave.

No matter what happens, I will always come back to you because I still am and always will be your baby.

You're irreplaceable Papa.
 I love you very much. Happy Father's day!


It feels really, really bad (actually bad is an understatement) that since I work as a news writer, I couldn't stay at home because the only holidays that we could have are Maundy Thursday and Good Friday. I feel so down that I really have work today.

Today's the first time that I have to do something during a supposed-to-be free day that's why I really feel the burden and weight of working today.
The only good thing today is that I get to talk to Macky all morning but as to getting a bath and getting ready for work, I really had to drag myself off my bed to fix myself and get ready.

All I wanna do right now is to be with Macky today, go out with my Mama and Papa or just chill out with my friends but I can't because I already put myself in this job, which I so love by the way, but for now I can't help but feel unlucky.

I guess I have no choice but to deal with this. Having this power to inform people entails a lot of responsibility.

So maybe just for today, I'll have this love-hate relationship with my work.

Almost there

I am happy.

My brother and I are talking again, I have an ever loving mom and my dad's trying to be the dad I knew again. I've got really loving friends who's been with me through euphoric and shitty things and I couldn't ask for more. Love and I are trying to start things anew; we are happy again and still very much in love. I may not have that high paying job but fulfillment and knowing your purpose is more important for me. I'm also very lucky to work with true and professional people who can be your workmates and friends at the same time.And most of all, I have a Boss up there who's bigger than my problems and who loves me.

Again, I am happy and I hope this feeling stays for long.

To whoever's reading this, I also hope you are happy. :)


I just want to type type type and hear the click of the keyboard keys because I'm already here in the office and I want to go home because it's Monday and I still feel that it's Sunday but what the hell it's already Monday so I have no choice but to go to work. *Sigh*

Sorry if I sound too sabaw but I'm just not in my feel good Monday mood.

I think I have UTI since err yesterday? I'm in pain and I don't know what to do about it. My dad and Max said I should just keep on drinking buko juice so I think that will do for now.

I also went to the mall before I went to work today. I wanted to buy a new jacket for the rainy season but I ended up just buying an umbrella, wet wipes for emergency purposes *wink* and a perfume bottle so I can transfer the content of my large perfume into a smaller one. I hope I really get to buy a new jacket soon before the rainy season officially begins.

My situation at home has not been easy for the past week. I don't want to discuss it further but my brother getting mad at me is just killing me. I hope we get to fix things as soon as possible.

I've just been awake for a few hours and this day is not being kind to me so I guess I'll just keep on reminiscing about my very happy Saturday last week and smile. Will write a post about it when I get home, but for now I have to find a twitter question for News on Q. Peelem!

Young souls

I never fully believed that someone so young could die so soon, especially when I personally knew the person.

The time Rico Yan died and news spread like fire, I had this feeling that I had to see his dead body first before I could believe it. I just couldn't accept the fact that someone who's very young and who's career is just blooming could die very early. 

But it was much harder when Kuya Brian died.

Brian Rivera's my grade school bestfriend's brother. We were bus mates and he would always seat across me while my best friend Kristen would sit by me. He was very funny as he would tease me often about getting fat for not sharing my food and as he said this, he would grab a handful of my food. What I really admired about him is that he was such a good brother. He would always carry Kristen's bag and he would always accompany her.

So when I heard the news that he drowned at a beach in Iloilo for saving a friend, my heart was crushed together with my best friend's family. For days, I just couldn't believe such a good son, friend, sister, boyfriend and brother would die so soon.

When I had the courage to finally go to his wake, I stared at his cold peaceful face for a very long time, and flashbacks of him laughing or smiling at me came back. Suddenly, I felt so much emotion that I couldn't cry. Right after we left, I cried in the van because I felt in my heart that he's really gone and I had to accept it.

I have to admit that sometimes up 'till now I couldn't believe he's really gone but as I have known him, he sure lived his short life to the fullest so I think I have nothing to be sad about.

I love and miss you Kuya Brian, Happy Birthday! I know you're happy in heaven.


I know we've been through a lot and the next days would be harder but I am willing to take the risk and go through all of this again with you because you love me and I love you.

I know we can do this.

Means a lot

Maybe because of my very tight schedule, just because I miss them or maybe because I don't get to spend much time with them, that every moment-- a small talk, a tight hug or a simple smile from a friend--- means a lot to me.

And I am very thankful that I still got to...

Talk to Elle on Facebook
Exchange SMS with Annie
Have a home visit from Dharel
Eat and watch a movie with him and Candice
Rant with Lian
Share emotions with Cara
Chat with Kate even if she's in Hongkong
Catch up with Angelique
Get an NBA advice from Cha
Talk to Deah every day
Sit and chat with Nachi
Have a date with Sam
Have a reunion with my highschool friends
And get a tight hug from Ralph

I can't thank God enough that I get or got these doses of love.

Work Story

I've been working for GMA 7 as a news writer for QTV11's late night news program, News on Q for 6 weeks now and I started working last April 26.

       I wake up during early mornings, whenever there's a phone call, and I take a bath a quarter before 1 p.m. My dad usually take me to work but since last week, I've been taking cabs since his eye just got operated. I usually arrive by 2 pm and try to condition myself that 'Yes, I am working now, no more dreaming, no more jokes'.

During the first three weeks, I spent my first thirty minutes in the office reading news updates on the news writing program, iNEWS. I still don't have my own account so I still use one of those old member accounts, Awie. But starting on my fourth week, I spent the first minutes of my time in the office browsing through news and other topics that could be used for the segment assigned to me which is the iPAD segment.

From 3 to 3:30 p.m., the whole News on Q team would be called upon to have the daily story conference wherein we discuss the topics we should air that day and brief ourselves as to how these would come out.

Right after this, my favorite activity of the day would happen--- Break Time. LOL.

My co-writers and I, sometimes even my bosses, would take our well-deserved meals before we start to bleed our fingers and brain out, uh, I mean when we starting writing our assignments. Sometimes I'm just assigned to do the teasers but at times, especially when another writer is absent,I would be asked to write varied stories; from Playboy to NBA to chili ice cream.

There were also times when I would need to watch tapes and take down notes of important scenes that could be used as videos as my articles are read.

Everyday for about 5 hours or so, I write scripts, preview videos, talk to my workmates, be obsessed with Cesar Apolinario, laugh at Nelson Canlas, Cesar and Lhar Santiago's stand up comedy show at the office every day, try to sneak in food and share it to friends, feel sleepy, know I'll see myself on TV, laugh too hard, dream of being a reporter, miss my friends, panic when something comes up, handle the iPAD....

....and when the clock strikes 9, our world stops and News on Q starts airing. And that hour becomes the most important part of my day.

I know my work may not seem exciting to some people especially those who are already living the adventurous life but I really love my job. I find it very fulfilling because I get to hear and see the fruit of my labor every day and it feels good to really let the people know what they have and need to know about our country. Aside from having the privilege to be in a healthy working environment and get to work with professional and down to earth people, it feels good that I am one of those people who get to help this nation be informed and know the truth.

When it comes to salary, I may not be well compensated but what's important is that what I do is important and very valuable. It feels to good to be of service and I wouldn't trade it for any other work.

( More work stories in the next posts! Sayonara!)